12 October 2005
4:58:00 PM
The Moon
today father got angry with me because i drank a lot of strawberry slimming milkshake with mother and i was too full to eat dinner and father and mother had an argument again and so i went to my room to play minesweeper and i got 99 seconds for the expert version, which is good.
then after that i read this book called space travels by frank weigner and it is about the different spacecrafts that have landed on mars for the past 10 years. people always say things like 'men are from mars' and 'women are from venus' but that's not true because if i was from mars then i would have had a spaceship that i bought or made in mars and i would have flown away from space long ago to sirius, one of jupiter's moons. next time the earth will become very hot because of global warming and everybody will die except me because i would be one of jupiter's moons that is covered in ice but the sun will have become hotter because it is dying and the ice will melt and there will be water for me to live and i can bring my books and my computer and sabre and lots of cans of baked beans and my swiss army knife so i can open the cans, but i don't have to use the saw blade because there will be nobody but me on that moon and i can be all alone like in my dream where everybody dies. and i can let sabre run loose because he will have to come back to me for food and i don't have to worry about losing him because it will be easy to look for him on a planet with nobody else.
this is what is going to happen in the future, but by that time i will be dead so i'm not telling a lie, i'm just putting myself in another person's(in the future) shoes and that's not considered imagination.
then after that i read this book called space travels by frank weigner and it is about the different spacecrafts that have landed on mars for the past 10 years. people always say things like 'men are from mars' and 'women are from venus' but that's not true because if i was from mars then i would have had a spaceship that i bought or made in mars and i would have flown away from space long ago to sirius, one of jupiter's moons. next time the earth will become very hot because of global warming and everybody will die except me because i would be one of jupiter's moons that is covered in ice but the sun will have become hotter because it is dying and the ice will melt and there will be water for me to live and i can bring my books and my computer and sabre and lots of cans of baked beans and my swiss army knife so i can open the cans, but i don't have to use the saw blade because there will be nobody but me on that moon and i can be all alone like in my dream where everybody dies. and i can let sabre run loose because he will have to come back to me for food and i don't have to worry about losing him because it will be easy to look for him on a planet with nobody else.
this is what is going to happen in the future, but by that time i will be dead so i'm not telling a lie, i'm just putting myself in another person's(in the future) shoes and that's not considered imagination.
16 September 2005
2:44:00 PM
That's so Stupid
today mother brought me to the toy store to look for new computer games for me. and when we got there we heard a boy screaming very loudly so i covered my ears and i wanted to curl up on the ground but that would be stupid and childish because i'm not a child anymore, unlike the boy who was screaming and banging his hands on the floor and rolling around and knocking all the Bionicle Action Figures down.
and mother said, 'you know, christopher, you used to do that too.'
and i said, 'i know. but now i don't do it anymore because it's stupid.' and the boy's mother tried to pick him up but he screamed louder and knocked down a pyramid of Barbie dolls and Kelly dolls and doll houses. and i thought it was very funny because his face was all scrunched up like a wrinkled bittergourd and when i told mother this she said, 'christopher. don't say things like that. it's impolite, ok?'
and i think she was angry. so i said sorry and ok.
and then the manager came and he tried to talk to the boy but he was screaming something like, 'me spiderman!' but i wasn't sure because it was so loud and he was crying and his word were all wet and bubbly and anyway 'me spiderman' doesn't make sense. and the boy hit the manager with his fist and i heard someone else scream, and i didn't like it when so many people were screaming, because that would make me want to scream too. so i said, 'i don't like it here. i want to go back home.'
and mother looked at me for awhile and she said, 'ok.'
and the boy carried on screaming. and i wondered if that was what i looked like when i was screaming, too.
and mother said, 'you know, christopher, you used to do that too.'
and i said, 'i know. but now i don't do it anymore because it's stupid.' and the boy's mother tried to pick him up but he screamed louder and knocked down a pyramid of Barbie dolls and Kelly dolls and doll houses. and i thought it was very funny because his face was all scrunched up like a wrinkled bittergourd and when i told mother this she said, 'christopher. don't say things like that. it's impolite, ok?'
and i think she was angry. so i said sorry and ok.
and then the manager came and he tried to talk to the boy but he was screaming something like, 'me spiderman!' but i wasn't sure because it was so loud and he was crying and his word were all wet and bubbly and anyway 'me spiderman' doesn't make sense. and the boy hit the manager with his fist and i heard someone else scream, and i didn't like it when so many people were screaming, because that would make me want to scream too. so i said, 'i don't like it here. i want to go back home.'
and mother looked at me for awhile and she said, 'ok.'
and the boy carried on screaming. and i wondered if that was what i looked like when i was screaming, too.
07 September 2005
2:36:00 PM
Birthday
today was my birthday and at 3.07pm i turned 17 years and 0 months and 0 days. father bought me a new computer that was a pentium 4, instead of the pentium 3 one we already have, because it's faster, and father chose a red central programming unit and a red monitor because he knows i like red.
and i went on google and i searched for 'puzzles' because that's what father asked me to do. and the first result was like this
JigZone: Jigsaw Puzzles
Gallery of free online jigsaw puzzles, with 6-247 pieces and unique piece shapes. Includes daily puzzle, e-cards, and an email service for the daily puzzle.
www.jigzone.com/ - 6k - 5 Sep 2005 - Cached - Similar pages
Log In - Register - Password Forgotten? - Puzzle Gallery
More results from www.jigzone.com ยป
so i clicked on the JigZone: Jigsaw Puzzles and i did their daily puzzle, with 67 puzzle pieces, and the picture was a swimmer, but they had named the picture triathlete, and i finished the puzzle in 2 minutes and 56 seconds, and father said, 'bravo, kiddo.' and this was the final picture
and i also tried out 1 more puzzle with 247 pieces shaped like triangles and i finished it in 5 minutes and 23 seconds, which is good. and i chose a picture of a siberian husky, like sabre, and the picture was like this
and after i finished i drank strawberry milkshake for tea and i ate some biscuits father had brought home from work and i watched space walk with mother on the television. and after that mother gave me a present and it was wrapped up with paper like this
and i wanted to open it to see what it was but mother asked me to guess what it was before opening it, and she said, 'then you can see if you're right.' but i couldn't guess what it was, because the present was 4 inches by 4 inches and it could be anything, like a funny-shaped pencil box, or a very small bag, or just a plastic box, or a big die, or a square candle, or a wooden block, or another small computer, or a small spaceship, or a box of candy, or a big biscuit, or a rubric cube, or a square toy car, or a magnet, and the list would go on and on. so i told her this and she said, 'fine, open it, christopher.' so i opened the present and inside it was a puzzle in a glass box. and the puzzle was made up of lots of pieces of metal tangled up together in the middle and it was like this
and i had to figure out a way to disentangle the pieces one by one, and there were 4 pieces and i have already figured out 2.
and i went on google and i searched for 'puzzles' because that's what father asked me to do. and the first result was like this
JigZone: Jigsaw Puzzles
Gallery of free online jigsaw puzzles, with 6-247 pieces and unique piece shapes. Includes daily puzzle, e-cards, and an email service for the daily puzzle.
www.jigzone.com/ - 6k - 5 Sep 2005 - Cached - Similar pages
Log In - Register - Password Forgotten? - Puzzle Gallery
More results from www.jigzone.com ยป
so i clicked on the JigZone: Jigsaw Puzzles and i did their daily puzzle, with 67 puzzle pieces, and the picture was a swimmer, but they had named the picture triathlete, and i finished the puzzle in 2 minutes and 56 seconds, and father said, 'bravo, kiddo.' and this was the final picture
and i also tried out 1 more puzzle with 247 pieces shaped like triangles and i finished it in 5 minutes and 23 seconds, which is good. and i chose a picture of a siberian husky, like sabre, and the picture was like this
and after i finished i drank strawberry milkshake for tea and i ate some biscuits father had brought home from work and i watched space walk with mother on the television. and after that mother gave me a present and it was wrapped up with paper like this
and i wanted to open it to see what it was but mother asked me to guess what it was before opening it, and she said, 'then you can see if you're right.' but i couldn't guess what it was, because the present was 4 inches by 4 inches and it could be anything, like a funny-shaped pencil box, or a very small bag, or just a plastic box, or a big die, or a square candle, or a wooden block, or another small computer, or a small spaceship, or a box of candy, or a big biscuit, or a rubric cube, or a square toy car, or a magnet, and the list would go on and on. so i told her this and she said, 'fine, open it, christopher.' so i opened the present and inside it was a puzzle in a glass box. and the puzzle was made up of lots of pieces of metal tangled up together in the middle and it was like this
and i had to figure out a way to disentangle the pieces one by one, and there were 4 pieces and i have already figured out 2.
04 September 2005
11:17:00 PM
Dog Pound
father brought me to the dog pound today to look for a new dog because sandy had run away and got knocked down by a car 4 months and 21 days ago and he promised to get me a new dog. but father didn't bring me to a pet shop because he said that the pets at the pet shop were very expensive and those in the pound could be adopted for free and father wanted to save money for my education.
the dog pound was dark and smelly and it smelt of dog poo and it was very dirty and also very noisy because all the dogs were barking and scratching and biting at the cage and they were running around in circles like toby II does in his cage at night. and i didn't like it but i went in anyway because i like dogs and it isn't their fault that they were acting like that because their owners had abandoned them and that's not right, and they were very lonely and sad because they didn't have owners and they were dirty because nobody bothered to clean them or their cages so there were piles of poo on the floor.
but i didn't like a lot of them because they were brown but eventually we found a dog and the sign on his cage was like this
GE SIB HUSKY
APPROX. 1/2 YR
WHT/SLVR
and i looked at the dog inside and he was about 1 metre long and he was looking at me and when he saw i was looking at him he stood up and his tail wagged and he poked his nose through the wire and he started to sniff and i put my hand there and he sniffed it. and he didn't bark like the other dogs, and he wasn't brown. so i said to father, 'i want this dog.' and father said, 'don't you want to see the rest? just in case there are nicer ones?'
but i didn't want to look at the rest of the dogs because i didn't want to be in the dog pound for too long because i was starting to feel sick so i said, 'no. i want this dog.' so father said, 'ok.' and he called the man in charge and they talked for awhile and then the man opened the cage and he lifted the puppy and he gave it to me and he said, 'here you go. easy now.' and i said, 'thank you,' because i know that's called being polite. and i stroked the dog and we went out of the dog pound and we went home.
and father said that i could give him a name, so i thought for awhile and i said, 'i'm going to name him sabre.' because i like that name and i had read a book about a wolf called sabre who was also white and silver and that wolf was a very clever wolf and it saved a small girl from a burning house. and father said, 'well, that's nice.'
and i said, 'i know.' and sabre licked my ear.
the dog pound was dark and smelly and it smelt of dog poo and it was very dirty and also very noisy because all the dogs were barking and scratching and biting at the cage and they were running around in circles like toby II does in his cage at night. and i didn't like it but i went in anyway because i like dogs and it isn't their fault that they were acting like that because their owners had abandoned them and that's not right, and they were very lonely and sad because they didn't have owners and they were dirty because nobody bothered to clean them or their cages so there were piles of poo on the floor.
but i didn't like a lot of them because they were brown but eventually we found a dog and the sign on his cage was like this
APPROX. 1/2 YR
WHT/SLVR
and i looked at the dog inside and he was about 1 metre long and he was looking at me and when he saw i was looking at him he stood up and his tail wagged and he poked his nose through the wire and he started to sniff and i put my hand there and he sniffed it. and he didn't bark like the other dogs, and he wasn't brown. so i said to father, 'i want this dog.' and father said, 'don't you want to see the rest? just in case there are nicer ones?'
but i didn't want to look at the rest of the dogs because i didn't want to be in the dog pound for too long because i was starting to feel sick so i said, 'no. i want this dog.' so father said, 'ok.' and he called the man in charge and they talked for awhile and then the man opened the cage and he lifted the puppy and he gave it to me and he said, 'here you go. easy now.' and i said, 'thank you,' because i know that's called being polite. and i stroked the dog and we went out of the dog pound and we went home.
and father said that i could give him a name, so i thought for awhile and i said, 'i'm going to name him sabre.' because i like that name and i had read a book about a wolf called sabre who was also white and silver and that wolf was a very clever wolf and it saved a small girl from a burning house. and father said, 'well, that's nice.'
and i said, 'i know.' and sabre licked my ear.
03 September 2005
10:39:00 PM
Writer's Block
i put down on my timetable that i was supposed to post on my weblog today but i don't know what to write because nothing significant has happened, except i got 99 percent in my math test because i didn't do a question because it said
give a reason why n
and then the print got really faded and i couldn't read the rest so i put up my hand but mrs green, my math teacher, couldn't see me because she has something wrong with her eyes because she is approximately 65 years old and i estimated her age because she didn't want to tell me, so i asked other teachers but they all just say, 'older than me.' which is not very helpful because mrs green is quite obviously older than them because mrs green has more white hair and her face has more wrinkles and she talks with a funny voice that also suggests that she is old. and old people usually have vision problems or hearing problems, which is why i didn't do that question.
so that gave me something to write because i had what you call a writer's block, and when that happens you don't know what to write and you have to think very hard of something to write and i have described how my math test went, because if i don't post and i ignore my timetable then my head will hurt and i will feel sick and i can't remove what i put on my timetable because that will make me feel giddy too.
but now i don't have writer's block, because i have already written 3 paragraphs' worth of words and that means that my writer's block has disappeared.
give a reason why n
and then the print got really faded and i couldn't read the rest so i put up my hand but mrs green, my math teacher, couldn't see me because she has something wrong with her eyes because she is approximately 65 years old and i estimated her age because she didn't want to tell me, so i asked other teachers but they all just say, 'older than me.' which is not very helpful because mrs green is quite obviously older than them because mrs green has more white hair and her face has more wrinkles and she talks with a funny voice that also suggests that she is old. and old people usually have vision problems or hearing problems, which is why i didn't do that question.
so that gave me something to write because i had what you call a writer's block, and when that happens you don't know what to write and you have to think very hard of something to write and i have described how my math test went, because if i don't post and i ignore my timetable then my head will hurt and i will feel sick and i can't remove what i put on my timetable because that will make me feel giddy too.
but now i don't have writer's block, because i have already written 3 paragraphs' worth of words and that means that my writer's block has disappeared.
02 September 2005
8:22:00 PM
Grammar Class
today i had my first grammar class and we had to write an essay about anything we wanted and i decided to write on the adventure i had had the year before last because it was the only exciting and true thing that happened to me because if i wrote a story it is also called a lie and i don't tell lies. and we had to present our essay to the class and it made me scared because everyone would be looking at me, and i wouldn't be able to calm down like what siobhan taught me to do because i would be in the middle of a presentation and if i stopped and did some breathing it would seem like i didn't know how to present, which is not true.
and then miss kirlding walked to my table and she said that i wouldn't have to present and so i said, 'ok.' and charlie, who is the boy sitting a seat away from me, looked at me funny so i didn't look at him because i didn't know what he was thinking.
a girl called marilyn walker was supposed to present first so she got up from her seat and she went and stood in front of the blackboard and her first word was, 'hello.' and everybody laughed, and i didn't like it because i don't like people laughing and i didn't see why it was funny because 'hello' is not a joke, but i kept quiet so that she could continue with her presentation and that is called being polite. and she started her presentation, but i can't give a lot of detail because i couldn't hear very well, maybe it was because i was sitting at the back or because she spoke very soft or my mind wasn't working properly, but that wasn't the case, because i wasn't nervous or frightened or scared.
and i heard a short phrase which i would like to put emphasis on. marilyn said, 'and there was blood all over and there were dead corpses on the ground.' and i stood up and i said that it wasn't logical, because corpses are already dead and there is no such thing as live corpses except for in scary movies, which are also stupid because it's all not true. and when i said this everybody looked at me and laughed and whispered so i sat down. and miss kirlding said, 'thank you, christopher.' and the other people in class laughed, and that is one of the reasons why i don't like this school, but it's ok because i get to do science projects and that is what i'm going to do when i become a scientist, after i take my A levels and pass with As.
and then miss kirlding walked to my table and she said that i wouldn't have to present and so i said, 'ok.' and charlie, who is the boy sitting a seat away from me, looked at me funny so i didn't look at him because i didn't know what he was thinking.
a girl called marilyn walker was supposed to present first so she got up from her seat and she went and stood in front of the blackboard and her first word was, 'hello.' and everybody laughed, and i didn't like it because i don't like people laughing and i didn't see why it was funny because 'hello' is not a joke, but i kept quiet so that she could continue with her presentation and that is called being polite. and she started her presentation, but i can't give a lot of detail because i couldn't hear very well, maybe it was because i was sitting at the back or because she spoke very soft or my mind wasn't working properly, but that wasn't the case, because i wasn't nervous or frightened or scared.
and i heard a short phrase which i would like to put emphasis on. marilyn said, 'and there was blood all over and there were dead corpses on the ground.' and i stood up and i said that it wasn't logical, because corpses are already dead and there is no such thing as live corpses except for in scary movies, which are also stupid because it's all not true. and when i said this everybody looked at me and laughed and whispered so i sat down. and miss kirlding said, 'thank you, christopher.' and the other people in class laughed, and that is one of the reasons why i don't like this school, but it's ok because i get to do science projects and that is what i'm going to do when i become a scientist, after i take my A levels and pass with As.
01 September 2005
1:55:00 PM
Sasquatches
sasquatches, also known as bigfoot, is most likely an alaskan brown bear. i say this because there is no real evidence that a bigfoot really exists because there are no proper pictures actually showing it, only drawings made by artists and eye witnesses who don't have anything else to do other than deceive other people. and i say it is most likely an alaskan brown bear because the bigfoot is supposed to be about the same height as the alaskan brown bear and they both have very hairy bodies to keep themselves warm and they both walk on two legs. the footprints left behind are most likely faked because other than that there is no other piece of evidence to support this claim and maybe a sasquatch is a more humanely evolved gorilla, but not particularly human, or maybe two breeds intercepted, and that would mean that sasquatches are sterile and rare like tigons and they are rarely or never seen, so i can conclude that there are no such things as sasquatches or bigfoots.